I recently had a client tell me that when she had a decision to make, she heard my voice in the back of her head. A reflection on a therapeutic conversation went through her mind. She made a different choice than they previous choice that she would have made!
And, good news… the new choice is leading her towards her goal!
Within myself, there was a private little party going on….
It makes me happy to hear that therapeutic conversations are taking full effect!
Sometimes it is surprising for me to find out something I said that was helpful to my client. I give a lot feedback, strategies, encouragement, comfort, and direction to my clients. I consider this seed-planting, but I do not always know which specific comment, directive, strategy, idea, or kind word might make a difference.
Here are some examples of comments I made during the past week:
- “You deserve better. I hope you will ask more directly for what you need.”
- “It sounds like you asked for what you wanted but when you got some pushback, you didn’t persist. Let’s talk about what might help you to be more persistent with your requests.”
- “If you weren’t feeling helpless, it seems like you would respond with saying…”
- “You are valuable, and you deserve to feel more validated and supported.”
- “I think you are a special person. I hope you can find a way to do one hour less of caretaking and carve out one more hour of personal time.”
- “It is not your fault if your teenager acts out. Ultimately, no matter how hard you have tried as a parent your 17-year-old is still responsible for her own choices.”
These are only a few of the comments I can think of from the past week, but chances are if my voice (or the voice of whomever your therapist might be) is in the back of your head, there is a positive nugget there to hold onto during this transformational time in your life.
If you need some help and someone’s voice cheerleading and guiding you, please Register to see one of our Relationship Repair Associates today for some support and guidance.