Many relationship therapists prescribe date night for couples who need to rebuild a relationship that has become dull and ho-hum. While I totally agree with this plan, I have also had couples who feel that it is too much of a financial burden. And couples with young children have the additional logistical and financial burden of hiring, scheduling, and paying a sitter. While it’s great to have a date night to get out away from the stresses of work, household chores, child rearing, and the distraction of several additional technological devices … sometimes it’s just plain not realistic.
Which is why I recommend “At-Home Date Night!” Speaking from personal experience, my husband and I have perfected the concept of At-Home Date Night. Pretty much any Friday or Saturday night when we are both at home and it’s not a scheduled date night to go out somewhere, it just a given that we have “At-Home Date Night.” It is automatic and expected…. at 8:30 pm when our younger child is in bed and our teens are either out with friends or have went off to play video games or read a book. . . . . we have our date night at home. The rules are: 1) no doing any household chores; 2) no talking with other people on the phone; 3) no devices or social media. The only “device” allowed is turning on the television if we mutually agree we would like to snuggle up on the couch and watch a movie or a television show that we both like. At-Home Date Night often includes a glass of wine with some cheese or popcorn but not always. It always includes at least a few minutes to talk about anything on our mind that we have not had time to discuss during the week. These nights are just as meaningful as going out so long as we stick to the rules and have quality time with few interruptions and a little romance. I recommend a fire in the fireplace, some time rocking on the front porch, lighting a candle, or turning on music.
So, that’s my version of “At-Home Date Night.” I recommend you set it up with your partner. Make it expected on certain nights of the week that work for your schedule! Follow the rules, make it romantic, talk with each other, and let me know how it goes!
