TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF –
The secret to finding love again comes from loving yourself first. Take care of yourself by doing the basics… exercise, eat healthy, drink lots of water, and get plenty of rest. You’ve heard it all before. But now more then ever is the perfect time to start developing new habits. Make a daily commitment to ensure you’re ready to move forward by taking the first step- love yourself! You deserve it! Treat yourself like you want your next partner to treat you. Try something new. Take a class. Go out and live life. Take the time out to reflect on the positive things you’ve accomplished in your life. Appreciate what you have and try not to focus on what you don’t have anymore. There’s so many wonderful things in store for you but you need to be happy first to experience these things.
STAY CONNECTED –
Finding a potential love interest could be as easy as meeting someone through your friends. It’s important to reestablish your friendships, reach out to your single friends. Make plans to go out with them. It’s been a long time since you’ve been able to let loose and really see whats out there. If you’re not into the social scene, try online dating. That’s a great tool to use to find some good matches. Be open minded. Don’t stay at home! You don’t know what’s out there if you don’t put yourself out there.
LET GO OF YOUR EX –
If you don’t let go of your ex then you will never be able to move forward with your life. You’ll continue to feel sorry for yourself, and feeling sorry for yourself can bring you into a negative state of mind. This leads to attracting negativity to your life. You can’t start over in that frame of mind. Don’t blame your ex or bash him to friends and family. Instead, join a support group, local church, visit a therapist to get extra support. Putting your ex down doesn’t help your situation. Stay focused on being positive about the divorce, have the “We tried and it just didn’t work” attitude. Being negative will only keep you single.
KEEP YOUR KIDS OUT OF YOUR LOVE LIFE –
Experts say that introducing your children to a new partner should only be done once your relationship gets serious. You don’t want kids to become attached to people in and out of your life. Be honest with your kids but they don’t need to be involved with adult situations. Never ask your kids about your ex’s love life- don’t get them in the middle of that. Instead have an open conversation with your ex about your new relationship. Reassure your kids that your new love will not take the place of your ex. Many kids do hope their parents get back together, expect that and have patience.
EXTRA ADVICE TO CONSIDER WHILE DATING –
Don’t talk about your Ex with your new dating partner. That’s just a no-brainer!
Go ahead and ask HIM out. Plan out a special evening. Flirt. Send fun text messages. But don’t come off desperate. Have fun and just be yourself. Don’t put pressure on yourself to be the perfect match. No one is perfect but soon enough you’ll find someone who is perfect for you.
If you need support while going through a divorce and for rebuilding your life, including dating again, see more about psychotherapy services here at my Relationship Repair Shop, and contact me for an appointment.