I recently had someone submit this question to me through the contact form on my website at www.drstephanieonline.com.
Dear Dr. Stephanie,
“How would I get a man to be in love with me and make a man know that I am the one for him ?”
I asked my intern Tyra Berger what she thought about this question, and this was her response:
“I would say there is no rule book or instruction manual on how to ‘get’ a man to do either of these things. If there is a mutual attraction and both people are willing and interested in each other, then that is the start to building a relationship. The relationship could possibly grow into a special bond where you both realize you are the one for each other. Falling in love should be a feeling that each person comes to a realization of on their own within the relationship – Preferably around the same time.”
I really like Tyra’s response, because it is true that you cannot make someone fall in love with you or convince someone that you are the one they should select as a partner. In fact, I would caution people against this kind of attitude because it is controlling.
Rather, I would urge you to focus on becoming the best person you can be, and if you really believe that a man you are interacting with might be the right guy for you, then flirt and get to know him … if he wants to get to know you! Relax and be yourself and if it’s meant to be, it will work out. Of course, you can tell him that you really like him and see how he responds, but if he does not think you are the right one for him – do not despair! The next man you have feelings for might end up being the one!
If you are looking for relationship advice, please submit a question on our contact form and we will post the answer on our blog and reply back to you.